Wallflower: The Life of the Unseen

I have these moments of freeze motion in the wake of frenzy, as if a movie scene has opened to reveal a glass vase flying into the air in slow motion. I am watching with no small amount of fear and trembling, anxious that the vase will shatter onto the ground, and I will be shown to be a fool for believing that the rules are breakable in the natural world, like they would be in a movie.

The frenzy is this past year of nonstop momentum. I have pressed onward and upward as a therapist in the trenches and am beginning to experience the rush of weariness that comes with stooping down low long and hard to lift up heavy, broken bodies. I am tired and want to sink deep in the mud and sleep, while the battle rages overhead, bullets blasting by to remind me that the time has not come for sleeping yet.

There is an anonymous, mysterious, lonely air to the trenches. For someone who knows what it's like to dance in the spotlight (literally), it has been a season of bowing low and humbling myself, submitting to the word the Lord gave me at the beginning of the year - that this would be the year of unseen for me. I first understood it to mean that I would be unseen, but later have come to understand that it means much more than that. As I submit to going unseen and unnoticed, my eyes have been opened to the world of the unseen, where God makes Himself known. The God whose face I see in Jesus. 

Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things unseen. {Hebrews 11:1}

~September 16, 2013

Such a breakthrough this past year - much more to come.